Maybe not.

We often view team harmony as the ultimate goal. We celebrate a lack of ego and a culture of collaboration.

Yet many professional groups fall into a subtle but dangerous trap: they mistake collegiality for alignment. When respect and trust are replaced by a mere avoidance of conflict, the result isn’t a better team—it’s delayed decisions, superficial consensus, and a lack of accountability.

Mistaking politeness for progress is more than a cultural quirk; it is a competitive crisis hiding in plain sight. Research recently reported in Harvard Business Review suggests that governance failures and a lack of probing questions can cause organizations to underperform their sectors by as much as 35% in the following year.

To determine if your team is tipping too far into comfort, watch for these five red flags:

• Avoidance of Accountability: Sensitive topics are consistently pushed to the end of meetings or deferred entirely to avoid discomfort.
• Superficial Consensus: The group moves quickly to agreement without exploring alternatives or risks, often resulting in unspoken concerns.
• Social Comfort Over Candor: Tension is defused with jokes or side-stepped to preserve “good feelings,” even when the actual path forward remains unclear.
• Unequal Voice Participation: Newer or quieter members hold back out of deference, depriving the group of fresh perspectives and relevant expertise.
• Shadow Governance: Key concerns are raised in private “offline” conversations with individuals rather than being debated by the full group.

 High-performing groups don’t just “get along”; they challenge each other’s assumptions with intellectual curiosity. You can shift your team’s dynamic with a few intentional structural changes:

1. Tackle the Tough Stuff First: Reserve the first 20 minutes of your meeting for the most uncomfortable topic when cognitive energy is highest.
2. Assign a “Chief Skeptic”: Rotate a role at each meeting for someone tasked specifically with finding flaws and proposing alternatives. Charge them with “The three potential downsides of this approach are . . . ”
3. Mandatory Round-Robin Input: Before a major decision, require every member to contribute a distinct concern or alternative approach instead of just agreeing with previous points.
4. The “Raise It in the Room” Norm: Require members to disclose any meaningful side conversations they’ve had about team matters since the last meeting.

True leadership requires distinguishing between genuine alignment and the dangerous comfort of surface-level agreement. When collegiality coexists with candor, it becomes a powerful driver of sharper decisions and stronger performance.

*Ideas for this blog taken from: Cozma, I. & Rodighiero, E.  “Is Your Board Too Collegial,” Harvard Business Review online, September 17, 2025.

In the business-organization world, we can’t waste time yelling at one another.  The collective needs to forge a path forward.

But how do you do that when sides are taken and the differences are significant?  The answer is: Dialogue.  Let’s consider this hypothetical workplace example and infuse some ideas from a recent Harvard Business Review article.

Let’s imagine that your boss has given a team of equals a challenge to solve.  You serve as a member of this team and there are two factions on what solution your organization should pursue.  You and a person from the other faction decide to meet to discuss this.  The boss has made it clear that the team needs to settle this, i.e., “Figure it out.”

Here is how you can engage your colleague with Dialogue:

1.  We are all committed to the mission.  Maintain a respectful and collegial tone at all times.  Start your meeting by acknowledging the mission commitment: “We all want is best for the organization – we just have different ideas of how to do that.  I know that you and the others have that commitment.”

2.  Signal a desire to learn.  Let them know that you are sincerely interested in their perspective.  “I want to make sure I get where you are coming from.  Help me better understand your viewpoint.” 

3.  Acknowledge the other side.  Once your colleague shares, then try to restate the viewpoint and test to see if you understand.  “Do I have that right?”

4.  Find common ground.  Try to find something – anything, that you can agree on.  Build from that. Keep in mind, you may need to set both of your ideas aside and invent a completely new direction together.  “Maybe there is a third way we can invent together that we will both find satisfactory?”

5.  Commit to creating a collaborative solution.  This will probably take more than one meeting.  Thank your colleague for their time.  Commit to continuing to meet until a satisfactory solution is found.

While none of these ideas will create a magical solution for your team, it is a solid roadmap to follow that can build trust and increase the odds that you will create a solution – and maintain good relations with all team members.

Of course, it would be refreshing if people could use this same formula in the public square.  We absolutely need less yelling at one another and more collaboration.  We all really do have the same mission.

*Ideas for this blog taken from: Collins, H. K. & Yeomans, M.  “A Smarter Way to Disagree,” Harvard Business Review, November-December, 2025.

Following are ideas you can use to influence your team or organization culture to make it more productive.  These are based on a recent article in Harvard Business Review.

When we talk about the “culture” of your team, we are talking about “the way we do things around here.”  When you take a collective look at the structures, procedures, systems, policies, & processes your team uses, as well as the behaviors you exhibit, this is your culture.  If you want to change the culture, then you need to change these things.  Once you change “the way you do things,” the result will be a change in culture.

Step 1: Identify the structures, procedures, systems, policies, processes, and behaviors you would like to see change and why – list the benefits of the change.

Step 2: Recruit a small group of people who you think will support your ideas.  Update your list based on their input.

Step 3: Reach out to the rest of your team and suggest that you set up a meeting to write a Team Charter.  A Team Charter is essentially a document that lists the structures, procedures, systems, policies, processes, and behaviors your team commits to following.  Read more at this link from the Center for Creative Leadership.

Step 4: Review and update your Team Charter.  Challenge your team to live up to the ideals you created in the charter.  Update it as you come up with better ideas.

A Team Charter can be used at the team or even the organization level.  It can be an excellent document to use during interviews: “this is our culture; this is the kind of team you would be joining.”  And it can be further reinforced during onboarding.

Of course, what is written on a piece of paper does not matter nearly as much as the role modeling of the culture by leaders.  If you really want your culture to be a powerful driver of performance, make sure that all leaders exemplify it.

*Ideas for this blog taken from: Chilazi, S. & Bohnet, I.  “To Make Your Workplace Fairer, Take Charge of It’s Norms,” Harvard Business Review online, May 2, 2025.

You know that feeling you have after a bad meeting where you are exhausted and unmotivated?  It turns out that there is a term for it: Meeting Hangover.

A recent article in Harvard Business Review reports a survey that shows 90% of workers have experienced this at least occasionally.  Research also finds these root causes of bad meetings:

• Irrelevance of topics discussed (59%)
• Lack of clear agenda or objectives (59%)
• Poor time management (53%)
• Lack of actionable outcomes or follow-up (48%)
• Unequal (39%) or low (38%) participation
• Ineffective facilitation (30%)

I can hear you exclaiming “YES!” after each of these!

Feel free to share this blog with co-workers.  Let’s face it, we can all do better in meetings.  Here are some ideas to help eliminate Meeting Hangover:

1.  Create Agendas with Action Items.  Attach an action-oriented question to each agenda item.  This will guide discussion.  Send the agenda out at least a day prior so people can come to the meeting ready to engage.

2.  Facilitate, Don’t Dominate.  This is not an opportunity for you – as the boss – to give a speech to the team.  The purpose of most meetings is group problem solving.  Get everyone involved and discuss ideas.  If you want to share information, send an email.

3.  Stay on Time.  Start on time, move the meeting along, and end on time – or early if you are done.  People will adore you for this.

4.  Build in Accountability.  You don’t need to keep meeting minutes, but someone does need to write down what each person agreed to do following the meeting and this needs to be sent out to everyone afterwards.  Follow-up and start your next meeting with updates on what people promised to do.

Meetings do not have to be terrible!  Make this your personal mission. Meetings can actually energize and focus people.  With the proper prep and facilitation, your meetings can be those that people look forward to.

*Ideas for this blog taken from: Reed, B. N., et. al.  “The Hidden Toll of Meeting Hangovers,” Harvard Business Review online, February 12, 2025.

1- Fearless Prioritization:  To serve on Higher Achievement’s board of directors, we are fearless in requiring FULL commitment. Serving this mission must be at least your #2 philanthropic priority to be considered for the board.  Another cause may be #1, but Higher Achievement has to at least be #2.

2- Intentional Cultivation: When I stepped into the CEO role, the board was ~12% people of color.  Especially given the scholars we serve (~98% Black and brown), staff composition (~70% people of color), and my identity as white woman, diversifying our board was critical.  Today, ~53% of our board members are people of color, two of whom are Higher Achievement alumni – including our board chair.  This took time.  We enforced our board term limits, established an Emeritus Board, and intentionally prioritized nominees of color who brought critical skills.

3- Comprehensive, Cohort Orientation: Early on, I underinvested in board member orientation, just spending an hour one-on-one. It was quick, but not effective. Board members tended to sit on the sidelines for too long. Now, we onboard cohorts of board members each fall, with a three-hour orientation that includes sections from each senior staff leader on program model, results and evaluation, risk management, human resources, finance, fundraising, and communications.  Now, board members enter the board retreat prepared.

4– Meaningful Meetings: We have to nix the “dog and pony shows”.  Instead of presenting only positive results, we share all the data – positive, neutral, and negative – and our initial conclusions and lessons learned.  Then, we ask a provocative question about the data and break into small groups to explore. Further, at least once per year, I meet one-on-one with each board member to hear about their board experience, their hopes/fears, and feedback for me.

5 – Regular Review: Every year, the board reviews my performance – alternating feedback from my direct reports and board members.  Every other year, we conduct a board self-assessment. This practice has led to meaningful changes to board orientation, annual updates to the CEO succession plan, and more democratic opportunities for board members to voice interest in board leadership roles.

While we have made progress, there is more work to do, including to immerse the board more deeply in program.  I hope my lessons learned are helpful to you.

One of the best ways to make sure your organization learns continuously is the consistent and effective use of After-Action Reviews.

After-Action Reviews have become popular in organizations.  However, they are often done sporadically and superficially.

A thorough AAR process can help turn failures into successes and make a good project, great.  Following are tips to make your After-Action Review process more effective:

*Every Project gets an AAR.  Create a cultural expectation that a thorough AAR is completed after every project.  Managers must insist that these are not optional.

*Everyone Participates with Candor.  Constructive conflict is good and you must agree to disagree.  Work through disagreements to form consensus – it cannot be imposed by leaders.

*Thoroughly Answer Each AAR Question: 1) What did we expect to happen?  2) What actually happened?  3) Why was there a difference between what we expected and what actually happened?  4) What can we change the next time?  Spend most of your time on questions #3 and #4.

*Everyone Needs to Own Mistakes.  Leaders especially need to step up and own their errors as role models for the team.  Don’t gloss over a breakdown to keep someone from feeling bad.

High performing organizations get that way by doing the little things well.  Making your AARs more effective might not sound glamorous but can provide a big payoff for your Mission Impact.

*Ideas for this blog taken from: Fletcher, A., Cline, P.B., & Hoffman, M.  “A Better Approach to After-Action Reviews,” Harvard Business Review online, January 12, 2023.

The substance and timing of Board Retreats vary widely.

My suggestion is that you take at least one day every two years for an off-site with your Board.  I know some Boards that do these annually for a couple of days and find it to be very helpful in building Board cohesion and commitment.

The substance of a retreat may include a combination of the following:

• Team-Building. This can be done in so many ways.  Do a personality styles assessment, read a teamwork book together, do a ropes course, or just have some fun together.
• Board Self-Assessment. Do a formal assessment prior to the Retreat, such as the one from BoardSource and review the results.  Make plans for improving your Board’s performance.
• Strategic Planning. This may be done as part of a larger overall strategic planning
• Personal/Professional Development. Bring in a guest speaker to teach about some work or life skills we can all use.

A few other tips:

• If possible, engage a facilitator to help organize and guide your activities
• Get away from the office and – if possible – spend at least one night away. Make sure people can fully disengage from their “normal” lives.
• Allow for unscheduled time when people can relax together

Most important of all – make sure that you are clear on your purpose and that you have communicated that to everyone.  Start the day with reminders of the importance of your mission, your vision for the future, and how the purpose of the Retreat connects to that.

A well-done Board Retreat can help supercharge your Board and inspire them to make even more of a Mission Impact.

Join the club.

Board meetings are often viewed by participants as necessary evils, perfunctory, and filled with “blah, blah, blah” reports.

Here are some ideas to make your Board meeting more strategic, engaging, and worthwhile.

*First, make sure that you have a Strategy for the future!  The Strategy should include three-five specific, outcome-based goals that the organization wants to accomplish during the next three-five years.  If you do not have these, then call a time out.  Either add these to your current strategic plan or start a new process that includes these.

*Next, establish a norm of a strong committee system in which:

1.) committees submit reports in writing to the Board prior to the meeting,

2.) Board members are expected to fully read the reports so they do not need to be summarized at meetings,

3.) non-controversial action items are provided as part of a “consent agenda” that can be approved at the beginning of the meeting,

4.) committees bring action items on substantive issues for consideration to the Board.  Committees should generally include Finance, Governance, Philanthropy, and an Executive Committee.

*Strategy updates make up the bulk of the meeting.  The CEO should provide a report that includes updates on:

1.) results on outcomes (not activities) on each of the strategic goals, along with a report on what is being done to get the outcomes back on track if they are not meeting their milestones,

2.) any internal operational issues that may impact the implementation of the strategy (i.e., new strengths or weaknesses),

3.) any changes in the external environment that may impact the implementation of the strategy (i.e., new opportunities or threats),

4.) any action on strategic issues required by the Board.

*Keep expectations and roles clear.  The staff does staff work, committees do committee work, and the Board does Board work.

For more great ideas on developing an effective Board and running impactful Board meetings, check out these resources from BoardSource.

It takes some effort to develop a Board’s norms to this level, but it will pay real dividends.  A strategically focused, engaged Board can greatly enhance your organization’s Mission Impact.

1. Document, distribute, and demystify. Avoid the “DK DK” dilemma of board members who don’t know what they don’t know. Document executive committee meetings and distribute the minutes to the full board. This helps shed light on what goes on at executive committee meetings.
2. Examine underlying practices and procedures. Some executive committees operate as the last stop before the board. All reports and recommendations must first be approved by the executive committee. In practice, this converts the rest of the board into a rubber stamp. Avoid this.  Other executive committees serve as the first stop for exploring issues with the CEO. These executive committees serve as a kitchen cabinet where the CEO can think out loud in the early stages of an idea. They share perspectives, ask questions, and suggest additional resources but do not make decisions. Try this instead.
3. Provide access. All board members should have access to the same information. Not all reports distributed to the executive committee need to be distributed to the full board. But, if any board members ask for that information, they should be briefed on the issues and provided appropriate reports without hesitation.
4. Ask, assess, and act differently. Executive committee members are often blind to the perceptions of other board members. Seek input from the rest of the board. At the end of a board meeting, have an AMA (ask me anything) discussion in executive session. For more anonymity, conduct a board self-assessment. A well-done online survey will surface any issues that may exist about communication between the board and executive committee. The key to success is not in the asking but in using the feedback to do things differently.

Being board chair hasn’t changed my concerns about executive committees, but it has made me more aware of the importance of good governance relations between and among the board and CEO. As I think about passing the baton to the next chair and executive committee, I plan to test these tips at my farewell meeting by asking the full board how well I lived up to my own recommendations.