And yet, so many leaders do this very poorly.

Some of the implications for lack of accountability include:

• Below average performance of the team and organization
• Resentment builds among team members
• Lack of accountability becomes a part of the culture and spreads
• Lose high performers who leave the company

Here is what you need to do to become better at holding others accountable:

1.  Make sure that you set the standard by following through with every commitment.  You set the tone.  Learn more here.

2.  Establish specific outcomes for every job.  Hold people accountable for the results they need to produce, not progress on their to do list.

3.  Make sure you are clear on the specific expectations of every team member.

4.  Communicate commitments made by each team member in writing after every team meeting.

5.  When people miss deadlines, contact them and ask for an update.  Discipline yourself to do this every time.  Don’t play favorites.  And, you don’t have to be a jerk about it.  Just ask.

6.  Encourage your team to hold one another accountable.

This is a good start.  If you do these things consistently, then you will build a culture of accountability.  In time, this culture will reinforce itself.  High performers will be drawn to your team.

I was not interested!  I didn’t need to “win” friends.  I was already good at “making” friends.  And the “winning friends” part made me suspicious that the “influencing people” part was about “how to manipulate” people.  Not interested.

Finally, enough people kept recommending it that I broke down and read it.  And I became a fan!  That was many years ago.  I have recommended the book and/or given it to many people over the years.  This little blog is my recommendation for you to read it as well!

The most important part of the book is Carnegie’s recommendation: “Become genuinely interested in other people.”

As you know, some people are “genuinely” interested in others – and some are not.  Some are way more interested in themselves.  I am guessing that since you are reading this, you are someone who IS genuinely interested in others – you care about them.  And if that is true, then this book will help you understand how to show people that you really care.

Here are just some of the nuggets from the book that may help you decide to read it:

• Remember names: A person’s name is, to that person, the sweetest and most important sound in any language.
• Be a good listener: Encourage others to talk about themselves.
• Show respect for opinions: Never say, “You’re wrong.”
• If you are wrong, admit it quickly and emphatically.
• Give honest and sincere appreciation
• Smile: It is a messenger of your goodwill.
• As a leader, praise the slightest improvement and praise every improvement.
• By controlling your ego and prioritizing the dignity of others, you naturally gain influence.

If you care about people, then using these behaviors will help people see it and feel it.

IMPORTANT: These are not tricks!  If you don’t care about people and use these behaviors, people will realize that you are full of it!

In a world that often rewards selfishness and in which many people don’t feel cared about, these are important behaviors to consider – if you really do care about others.  And, of course, if you don’t care, people will figure you out.  You cannot fake sincerity.

The research on trust is very clear.

Leaders who are trusted are much more effective.

Teams that trust one another are more effective.

And organizations in which high levels of trust exist among employees are more effective.

This all starts with you as a leader.

Can people count on you to be honest with them and to tell the truth – the whole truth, without any “spinning?”

Do you have the best interest of your team in mind at all times?

When you are faced with a dilemma, can people count on you to work it out as best you can?

Do you speak up when you know it is the right thing to do?  And how about – when you know it may not be in your best interest to do so?

These are not easy things in a world that often rewards selfishness.  But if you can answer “yes” to these questions, then you are on the path to becoming a genuine leader of integrity.

What kind of leader do you want to be?

Maybe not.

We often view team harmony as the ultimate goal. We celebrate a lack of ego and a culture of collaboration.

Yet many professional groups fall into a subtle but dangerous trap: they mistake collegiality for alignment. When respect and trust are replaced by a mere avoidance of conflict, the result isn’t a better team—it’s delayed decisions, superficial consensus, and a lack of accountability.

Mistaking politeness for progress is more than a cultural quirk; it is a competitive crisis hiding in plain sight. Research recently reported in Harvard Business Review suggests that governance failures and a lack of probing questions can cause organizations to underperform their sectors by as much as 35% in the following year.

To determine if your team is tipping too far into comfort, watch for these five red flags:

• Avoidance of Accountability: Sensitive topics are consistently pushed to the end of meetings or deferred entirely to avoid discomfort.
• Superficial Consensus: The group moves quickly to agreement without exploring alternatives or risks, often resulting in unspoken concerns.
• Social Comfort Over Candor: Tension is defused with jokes or side-stepped to preserve “good feelings,” even when the actual path forward remains unclear.
• Unequal Voice Participation: Newer or quieter members hold back out of deference, depriving the group of fresh perspectives and relevant expertise.
• Shadow Governance: Key concerns are raised in private “offline” conversations with individuals rather than being debated by the full group.

 High-performing groups don’t just “get along”; they challenge each other’s assumptions with intellectual curiosity. You can shift your team’s dynamic with a few intentional structural changes:

1. Tackle the Tough Stuff First: Reserve the first 20 minutes of your meeting for the most uncomfortable topic when cognitive energy is highest.
2. Assign a “Chief Skeptic”: Rotate a role at each meeting for someone tasked specifically with finding flaws and proposing alternatives. Charge them with “The three potential downsides of this approach are . . . ”
3. Mandatory Round-Robin Input: Before a major decision, require every member to contribute a distinct concern or alternative approach instead of just agreeing with previous points.
4. The “Raise It in the Room” Norm: Require members to disclose any meaningful side conversations they’ve had about team matters since the last meeting.

True leadership requires distinguishing between genuine alignment and the dangerous comfort of surface-level agreement. When collegiality coexists with candor, it becomes a powerful driver of sharper decisions and stronger performance.

*Ideas for this blog taken from: Cozma, I. & Rodighiero, E.  “Is Your Board Too Collegial,” Harvard Business Review online, September 17, 2025.

This is easier said than done.  According to a recent article in Harvard Business Review, managing spirits during anxious times requires more than a “keep calm and carry on” poster; it requires intentional, human-centric action.

The quickest way to lose a team’s trust is to pretend everything is fine when it clearly isn’t. Anxiety thrives in silence and ambiguity. As a leader, your first task is to name the reality.

Validating your team’s concerns doesn’t make them “weaker”—it creates a foundation of psychological safety that allows them to actually focus on their work instead of their worries.

Anxiety often stems from a lack of agency. To counter this, help your team zoom in on what they can influence.

• Focus on Purpose and Values: Reinforce the things that are not changing. Remind people that they are a part of something important. Role model the values and what you stand for.
• Clarify Short-Term Goals: When the long-term feels murky, break projects down into “wins” for the next 48 hours.
• Establish Routine: Predictability is the antidote to chaos. Maintain your 1-on-1s and team huddles, even if there isn’t a major “update.”
• Set Boundaries: In anxious times, the line between “working from home” and “living at work” can blur.  Encourage your staff to truly disconnect.

Model vulnerability, not perfection.  You don’t need to be a stoic statue. In fact, if you’re feeling the pressure, say so. When a leader admits, “I’m finding this week a bit challenging too,” it gives the rest of the team permission to be human. This isn’t about dumping your stress on them; it’s about modeling how a professional navigates stress with resilience.

Finally, remember that empathy and productivity are not at odds. Being a “supportive” leader doesn’t mean lowering standards; it means providing the emotional resources your team needs to meet those standards. By prioritizing connection and clarity, you don’t just help your team survive an anxious season – you build a culture that can weather any future storm.

*Ideas for this blog taken from: Gulati, R. “How to Keep Your Team’s Spirits Up in Anxious Times,” Harvard Business Review online, September 8, 2025.

Yes – just like your children – you love all of your employees the same.

But, let’s face it – if you have some stars – you do not want to lose them.

If you have recently added a star to your team, use this as a personal wakeup call.  You need to step up your game.  You need to manage your team and your new star in an A+ fashion.  While many employees might put up with your mediocre management, your star will not – not for long.

According to a recent article in Harvard Business Review, keeping these high-flyers requires a management style that balances high-stakes work with long-term career satisfaction.  This is something that you can apply to the management of all your employees.

You should have regular developmental conversations with everyone on your staff – and these are especially critical for your stars.  Ask your team members:

• What’s working for you?
• What’s not working for you?
• What would you like to do next?

To prevent your star staff from becoming someone else’s success story, consider these approaches:

• Prioritize Autonomy: High performers crave the space to work their way. Micromanagement is the fastest way to drive a superstar toward the exit.
• Deliver on the “Sell”: When you hired them, you promised a specific culture and impact. Now, you must ensure their day-to-day reality matches that pitch.
• Manage Team Dynamics: You need to give your stars what they need to thrive without creating resentment among existing team members. It’s a delicate balance of providing extra support while ensuring everyone feels valued.
• Hold Everyone Accountable to High Standards: This is the right way to manage a team, and high performers get especially frustrated with organizational mediocrity.
• Reinforce the Difference They are Making: Make sure the entire team knows their impact and show people how their specific actions contribute to the organization’s performance.
• Identify Their Drivers: Not every star is motivated by the same thing. For some, it’s autonomy; for others, it’s constant learning or high-profile visibility.

A star who feels stagnant or ignored will start looking elsewhere.  You need to pay special attention to keep them engaged, adaptable, and constantly learning.  Bring you’re A+ game to work every day!

*Ideas for this blog taken from: Knight, R. “Don’t Lose Your Star New Hire,” Harvard Business Review online, October 14, 2025.

However, there is a significant difference between being a supportive leader and being “too nice”.

When niceness becomes a shield to avoid difficult conversations, it doesn’t just stall productivity—it actively harms your team’s development and the organization’s health.  You can be “nice,” while also being firm and effective.

According to a recent article in Harvard Business Review, the primary symptom of being “too nice” is the avoidance of healthy conflict. By avoiding the discomfort of a hard conversation, you are prioritizing your own emotional ease over your employee’s growth.

When you fail to address underperformance or provide clear, direct feedback, you create several organizational risks:

• Stunted Growth: Employees cannot improve if they don’t know where they are falling short.
• Resentment Among High Performers: Your top talent will notice when low performance is tolerated, leading to burnout and a lack of motivation.
• Lack of Clarity: Vague, “nice” feedback leaves people guessing about their standing and your expectations.

The solution isn’t to become a harsh or abrasive manager. Instead, the goal is to shift from “nice” to clear and kind. True kindness involves being honest enough to tell someone the truth so they have the opportunity to succeed.

To bridge this gap, consider these three strategies:

1. Directness is a Gift: View feedback as a tool for success rather than a personal attack. Be specific about what isn’t working and what “good” looks like.
2. Normalize Disagreement: Encourage your team to challenge ideas—including yours. This creates a culture where the best idea wins, rather than the most comfortable one.
3. Prioritize Accountability: Set clear boundaries and consequences. Being a leader means holding people to the standards they agreed to, which is ultimately the most respectful way to treat a professional.

Leadership is not a popularity contest; it is a responsibility to guide your team toward their best work. By trading “nice” for “honest,” you build a foundation of real trust and lasting excellence.

*Ideas for this blog taken from: Ashkenas, R. & Cooks, G., “Is Your Leadership Style Too Nice?” Harvard Business Review online, January 12, 2026.

Recent research reported in Harvard Business Review tells us that worker dissatisfaction is on the rise.  As a leader, this is your opportunity to step up your game and support your team’s continuous improvement.

Following are eight questions to ask yourself about improving your team’s satisfaction and performance:

1. What are the biggest frustrations my team faces, and what am I doing to remove them?  Actively eliminate obstacles, especially excessive workload, shifting priorities, or clunky approval processes.

2. What decisions am I holding onto that my team could be making?  Avoid being the bottleneck. Give your team specific authority, making it explicit which calls they own.

3. Where am I making people do things my way when I could be giving them flexibility?  Grant autonomy—a high-impact, low-cost way to improve satisfaction. Trust them to manage their schedules and, where possible, offer control over where and when they work.

4. How can I create opportunities for genuine connection?  Strong relationships drive job satisfaction. Hold regular meetings that go beyond status updates, and create time for team members to connect with each other.

5. What am I doing to support my team’s well-being?  Make mental health and wellness resources visible, and actively encourage their use without guilt. As a leader, you must also model balance yourself.

6. How am I making people feel valued and helping them see the meaning in their work?  Offer regular recognition—it’s hard to feel miserable when you feel valued. Share success stories that link an employee’s efforts to real outcomes, reinforcing that what they do matters.

7. Where could I be doing more to help people advance in their careers?  In an uncertain economy, learning and growth are critical. Look for low- or no-cost development opportunities like stretch assignments, mentoring, or job shadowing.

8. When was the last time I took a hard look at whether our pay is competitive?  If you have limited authority over pay, talk openly with employees about how compensation decisions are made. Help them understand the logic and fairness behind the system.

Improving morale won’t happen overnight, but small, consistent actions matter more than grand gestures^. By staying attuned to these eight factors, you can remove obstacles where possible and treat people like they matter.

*Ideas for this blog taken from: Knight, R.  “Employee Discontent is on the Rise.  Here’s What to Do About It,” Harvard Business Review online, October 29, 2025.

Your role as a leader is primarily context-setting—explaining why the work needs to be done, the expected outcomes, the deadline, and the behavioral guardrails. The team should own the activity-based work, making the decisions about how to execute, because their time is less costly and they are more motivated when given autonomy.

The biggest internal challenge to letting go is often the “dopamine hit of personal productivity.” Activity-based work offers regular, satisfying rewards as you check off lists, while context-setting is cognitively taxing and offers less frequent chemical rewards.  Here are some ideas on how to manage this from a recent article in Harvard Business Review:

Create Different Checklists: You can still get that satisfying “tick” by making checklists for your context-setting work. For a meeting, track that you’ve (1) explained the why, (2) outlined the expected outcomes, and (3) described the desired behaviors.

Routinize Good Practices: Structure your one-on-ones around a consistent set of questions, like asking what your direct report’s most pressing challenge is and how you can support them.

Reframe Your Purpose: Shift your focus from short-term personal production to longer-term goals. Remind yourself that by staying out of the activity zone, you are helping the organization scale and encouraging your employees to grow.

When a team member asks for activity-based guidance, you must redefine how you help. Use a four-step model to give the work back to them:

1. Re-explain the context: Prompt them to recall the mission, required outcomes, and behavioral expectations.
2. Give the work back: Follow up by asking, “So given that context, what do you think the priority is?”.
3. Teach with examples: If they lack experience, explain how you made similar decisions in the past and what you learned, then ask how those lessons apply to their situation.
4. Establish accountability: End the conversation with, “Let me know how that goes and when you’d like to check in with me again”.

By consistently declining to join your team’s activity zone, you signal that you trust their judgment, forcing stronger players to step up and even reticent ones to try harder to make decisions. Effective delegation is one of the most important skills a leader can learn, enabling you to get more out of your team and fully embrace your role as a strategic thinker and developer of talent.

*Ideas for this blog taken from: Johnson, E.  “Why Aren’t I Better at Delegating,” Harvard Business Review, September-October, 2025.

Teams without trust have interpersonal tension and frustration, are less motivated, play politics, and cannot get important decisions made.  Trust is the foundation of effective teamwork.

This all starts with you as a leader.  Are you honest and transparent with your team, do you keep your promises, and do you treat everyone with a high level of respect?  If you can answer YES to all of these, then you are off to a good start.

Once you are role modeling integrity, the next thing you can do is to show that you are human.  Admit your mistakes and share vulnerability now and then.

Building trust among team members is largely a matter of helping them get to know one another better.  Here are some activities that you and your team can do together to build trust:

• Do some of the personality assessments and share results. My favorite is the CliftonStrengths, which tells you things that you are really good at.  This is a great thing to share and most people are usually willing to talk about their strengths.
• Get out of the office – even if it is just for the day. Go to a park or do a ropes course.  I have seen lots of team relationships develop after everyone completes a “trust fall”
• Share Personal Histories. Ask everyone to tell their life story in three segments – it can be chronological or share different aspects of your life.  Some people are more private than others – which is fine.  But it can definitely deepen relationships to find out someone’s story.
• Explore one another’s values. There are a number of ways to do this and here is one resource.  The activity gives each person to talk about what is important to them and why.

There are many more things you can do, but this is a good starter list.  After doing some of these you can set up a team-building committee with responsibility to set up regular activities to help the team bond.

Establishing trust is essential for every high performing team.  Be sure to continue role modeling integrity as you encourage your team to get to know one another better and better.  The end result will be a team that enjoys working together and achieves excellence.