We’ve all had them.
What do you do with an Overly Critical Boss!?!
It feels like you are working under a microscope.
You can’t do anything right.
They nitpick.
And every project provides an opportunity for a grand inquisition of questions.
Here are some tips from a recent article in Harvard Business Review.
First, stay strong and confident. Yes – you are still the very capable person who was hired into your current role. The most important thing you need to remember about the Overly Critical Boss is that their attitude is all about THEM and their insecurities. With that in mind, even though it is very hard, try to have some empathy for them as they engage with you.
Next, view their feedback as engagement. They care about you and your work. Their tone and content of their delivery may not be ideal. When they say “This report is totally unacceptable,” try to imagine them saying “This report has issues.” And try to engage them with curiosity. “Please tell me more.”
Get ahead of their negativity. Be proactive. Provide a draft outline of what you are working on and ask for suggested improvements. Then use their ideas to build out your report or project.
Directly ask for positive feedback. For example: “I appreciate your ideas on how I could improve the presentation. Just to make sure I am clear, what are some aspects that you think hit the mark.” Press for more balanced feedback.
Reward good behavior. Hopefully, your boss is not critical all the time. When they do provide some positive feedback, make sure to show your appreciation.
The Overly Critical Boss got this way based on years of experiences they have had – that you will never fully understand or change. Do your best to engage them with a positive attitude. And make sure to stay connected to colleagues who can give you more of the positive feedback you deserve.
Finally, these suggestions are “survival techniques.” Depending on how bad things are, you may need to seriously consider making a career move if the boss does not look like they are going to leave first. You need to make sure to take care of your mental and emotional well-being.
*Ideas for this blog taken from: Wilding, M. “How to Work for an Overly Critical Boss,” Harvard Business Review online, June 4, 2024.
